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Working With Your Tough Kids and Even Those That Aren't

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Episode 359 FPN MSW: Power and Control

Power and Control

Power and Control

Join us as we discuss:

The concepts of using power and control and how you are probably using them without even knowing. 

An article of a Georgian mom who called the cops to issue a faux-arrest of her 11 year old kid for talking back. 

How to repair relationships when we’ve been parenting through power and control.

SHOW NOTES

Georgia Mom Scares Disobeying Son – thanks to John for this article.

How to Do Parent-Child Relationship Repair – thanks to Julie for this article.

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Episode 338 FPN Media Sucks Monday

Media Sucks MondayJoin us as we discuss:

Teacher Toms article on the ultimate weakness of punishment.  That’s right, punishment is not the best and now we don’t recommend letting kids do whatever they want.  

On a lighter note, we cover Christina Antis’ article on 10 Dumbest Things I’ve Said to my Toddlers

 

 

 

SHOW NOTES

The Ultimate Weakness of Punishment

The 10 Dumbest Things I’ve Said to my Toddler

 

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Episode 301 FPN Spanking: The Anti-Freedom

 

Chained Sky by Clearly Ambiguous at Flickr

Chained Sky by Clearly Ambiguous at Flickr

Join us as we discuss:

How spanking is converse to what we typically believe about personal sovereignty and freedom.  

The difference between teaching kids to do right for fear of pain versus doing right because they recognize it is right through the freedom of choice.

How spanking is not raising freedom minded men and women, but those that submit to authority…and the bigger stick.

 

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Episode 22 RFGP: Discipline, Correction, and Punishment. Not The Same Thing.

Kids in jail by pagetx at Flickr.Join me as we discuss:

Discipline, Correction, and Punishment.  How they are very different things.

How most times, these concepts are completely confused and how there really are more things that just spanking.

Stories  from both Jeff and Trey on failures, successes, and what we did about them.

 

 

 
SHOW NOTES

Today I saw a meme on Facebook (see right) that insinuated that to stop kids from becoming gangsta delinquents, we need to spank them more.  Now, I get that many interpret this as “more kids need solid discipline” but there is a pervasive misunderstanding what punishment is. 

Today Jeff and I touch on the tough topic of discipline, correction and punishment.  Jeff summarized it best when he said:

“kids deserve to be disciplined.  They deserve to be corrected.  But no kid deserves to be punished.”  

Today we cover why that is and how you can absolutely set good boundaries with kids without needing to “beat it into them” and how this also doesn’t make you a laissez-faire, do whatever you want parent.  Also, I highly recommend you check out Jeff’s blog on this (see below).  It has WAY more good stuff in it that we couldn’t get to.

Discipline, Correction, and Punishment – a wonderful blog topic written by Jeff.  

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Episode 161: Jeff Emery – When Nothing Has Worked with My Kid

Parenting Pyramid by Arbinger InstituteJoin me as we discuss:

The answer to  that infamous question: “what do I do when nothing has worked.”

What if grounding, taking stuff away, and whoopin’ em just isn’t cutting it?

Trey, my kid doesn’t like me so my teaching isn’t working.  What now?

How do you make this work if I’m separated from my ex-spouse?  

 

So many parents are frustrated because they have gone from expert to expert with no  major results with their kids.  Is all hope lost? Is there nothing we can do?  Absolutely false and there is hope!

Today my great friend Jeff Emery is on for his second time to discuss the Parenting Pyramid and how to find, on that spectrum, where our issue occurs.  I know sometimes I am afraid to admit that maybe it’s me that generating the issues I’m bumping in to, but there is an inherent freedom to that.  

But, instead, I hammer on correcting my kiddo.  Taking away privileges  grounding them, or worse yet: yelling.  *gasp  But what do we do when we’ve tried all the things we’ve been taught, heard about, or even seen on TV with no results?  

Jeff walks us through the Parenting Pyramid and potentially unlocks why you’ve been having such a hard time with your kid:

  • Correction
  • Teaching
  • Parent/Child Relationship
  • Executive Parenting
  • Way of Seeing

 

SHOW NOTES

Click Here to see a large version of the Parenting Pyramid by The Arbinger Institute.

Jeff’s Website – great site Jeff has put together with a blog!

Leadership and Self Deception – one of my personal favorite books by The Arbinger Institute. 

The Anatomy of Peace – another personal favorite of mine by Arbinger.  

 

 

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Episode 119 Ground-ah-mah-kation: Right and Wrong Ways to Ground a Kid

“YOUR GROUNDED!!!” Photo compliments of eddie gunn at Flickr.

Join me as we discuss:

How many parents are not using grounding appropriately.

What are the wrong ways to ground a kid?

What are the right ways to ground a kid?

Episode 100 Four Major Discipline Mistakes

Photo compliments of theirhistory at Flickr.

 

 

Join me as we discuss:

*Media Monday: 8 Discipline Mistakes Parents Make by Amanda May

*What exactly is discipline?

*The top 4 parenting no-no’s in discipline I pulled from Amanda’s article.

 

SHOW NOTES

8 Discipline Mistakes Parents Make

 

Episode 33_Logical Consequences and Why Punishment Doesn’t Always Work

 

 

 

Photo compliments of bbcworldservice.

 

Join me as we discuss:

*What are logical consequences.

*How they are different from punishment.

*Why punishment along RARELY works.

*How we can rely on Consequences to help produce better results.

 

SHOW NOTES:

csefel Article on Logical Consequences


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